Where do we get this notion that being organized is next to godliness? I’m pretty sure we get it from magazines and ads in those magazines. And though they really may be great magazines full of super recipes and ideas that inspire us, they can also set us up to start laying guilt trips on ourselves. Something like this: “If I was really together, my closets would look like those featured in Martha’s Living, where stacks of sheets are tied with color-coded ribbons.” Just a little reminder here: Martha has fleets of housekeepers who wash and iron those sheets and keep them tied up with ribbons. You, on the other hand, do not.

Now I do not begrudge her. My hat’s off to her for all she has done to restore the honor due to the fine arts of domesticity. She obviously has a gift of organization, I really appreciate her creativity, and I read her magazine. But I’m just saying that my closets are not photogenic, and I don’t think I need to feel too crummy about it. Do you? Now, I do regularly try to rearrange them and tidy them up by making a run to Goodwill. But I feel pretty fantastic if all the sheets are washed and back on the beds. Ribbons? Hardly.

Christian women tend to be pretty hard on themselves in these areas of organization. I sometimes slip back into thinking that if only I could be more organized, then I would truly be holy (or rather, I would feel pretty holy). I remember telling my husband something like this years ago, and he replied with profundity: “What makes you think I would want to be married to you if you were more organized?” Now this made me think. Continue reading ‘How Organized Are Your Closets?’

Here’s a great question: Why should parents give kids a break from school/chores when Mom and Dad continue to work 24/7/365?

First of all, because they are kids. They are not yet mature enough or strong enough to be working like adults. So, we consider their frame, and we don’t bury them in year-round studies. Solomon knew this when he pointed out that “much study is wearisome to the flesh” and I assume his comment was not limited to adults.

Wise Solomon said a few other things as well: “Do not be overly righteous, nor be overly wise: why should you destroy yourself?” Earnest Christians can overdo things in their desire to be “godly,” and this can include loading up the kids with way too many “righteous” things to do. Easy does it.

We want to be reformational in our thinking and living. We believe our theology should affect all of our living, so that means we ought to live like we believe it. Reformed types tend to over-emphasize stuffy theology and try to take shelter from living by hiding behind stacks of big fat books. Live a little. Maybe you need to take a break from your frenetic pace and take a pottery or painting class yourself. Or maybe ballroom dancing or Continue reading ‘Why Give Kids a Vacation Anyway?’

One of the vulnerable times for marriage seems to be after twenty-five years or so, just when things ought to be getting really good. And it can surprise everyone that anything could go wrong. But lots of things do go wrong right smack in the middle of what has appeared to be a solid marriage for two or three decades.

The kids have been raised, the house is emptying out, and a crisis erupts. What causes such things? After years of gradual erosion, the bank finally slides down the hill. In other words, little things have been slowly eroding the marriage, things that have not been being dealt with, and finally, when the damage has become too much to bear, something gives way.

Sometimes the couple has been through tough times together, but the result, rather than Continue reading ‘Mid-Life Marriage’

Don’t feel too sorry for us. The forecast is for sunshine and the seventies Friday and Saturday. But don’t blame us if we don’t believe it!

Even though the sun has not yet presented its summertime face to us here in the Great White North, we have been bravely acting as though we hadn’t really noticed, pretending that June is supposed to behave like March. But I have to say we have now been beat. It is snowing as I write this! No fooling. White stuff dumping out of the sky right on to my tomato plants and geraniums! If we could buy spring for any price, everyone in this town would gladly chip in. But in spite of the oobleck falling on my front porch, it is gorgeously green out here, even if it’s still a tad chilly. (See the picture at the end of this post to prove it!)

But, that is not my subject at hand. I was thinking of writing something about what to do with the kiddos now that school is out for the summer months (notice I didn’t actually call it summer….just those months we refer to as the summer months).

I remember the comments I used to get even at the grocery store check out. “Oh aren’t you just dreading summer with the kids home from school?” What a terrible outlook. I was, in fact, looking forward to the lazy summer days.

Some moms (sorry, but I know this is true) make their own children dread summer vacation by piling on the duties, rules, and schedules. What a drag. How much better to make summer a real pleasure rather than drudgery. Still, there have to be some guidelines and goals, right? Well here are a few suggestions in case you were needing Continue reading ‘Summer? What Summer?’

In Psalm 15:1-3 we see who is going to live in God’s house and who is not.

“Lord, who shall abide in thy tabernacle? Who shall dwell in they holy hill? He that walketh uprightly, and worketh righteousness, and speaketh the truth in his heart. He that backbiteth not with his tongue, nor doeth evil to his neighbor, nor taketh up a reproach against his neighbor.”

We’ve got parallel lists of behavior here. The wise walks, works, and speaks, and these actions are characterized by uprightness, righteousness, and truth. What he is not doing is important here as well. He is speaking the truth in his heart, not backbiting; he is working out righteousness, not doing evil; and he is walking uprightly, not taking up a reproach or grievance against his neighbor. This is the kind of company God keeps. If we want to dwell in His holy hill, we have to see and keep these do’s and don’ts, particularly as it relates to our tongues.

What is it to backbite? It is to spread slander; to be a tattler and a busybody, spinning the story to make someone look worse, attributing motives. This kind of thing always begins in the heart before it works its way out the mouth. From there it picks up and carries a grievance, and then, if not stopped, it begins crusading, gathering others to carry the grievance as well. It does evil to its neighbor. But it doesn’t just affect the neighbor who is being wronged; it infects and destroys those with the grievance, hurting them far worse than the neighbor they sought to destroy. God hates this stuff. Continue reading ‘Truth Talk’