Comments on: An Immodest Standard http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/ Sat, 30 Aug 2008 06:29:46 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=wordpress-mu-1.2.5 By: Wondering... http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-64883 Wondering... Fri, 23 May 2008 04:23:57 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-64883 "And here’s the advantage: We can be and look beautiful, whatever size we are, in modest dress, even though we would look just awful in the swimsuit that girl is modeling on the magazine cover." I'm wondering if that is an advantage or not. I honestly don't dress to please anyone but my husband. And knowing that I "look just awful" in that swimsuit that is thrust before my husband's eyes on every magazine rack I see breaks my heart. And I'm not fat. Actually, I'm the opposite. My husband guards his eyes, but I get so frustrated with what's out there. I dress modestly because God calls me to glorify Him. But I have a hard time relaxing (disrobed) around my husband knowing so many better samples have been displaying their wares all day. “And here’s the advantage: We can be and look beautiful, whatever size we are, in modest dress, even though we would look just awful in the swimsuit that girl is modeling on the magazine cover.”

I’m wondering if that is an advantage or not. I honestly don’t dress to please anyone but my husband. And knowing that I “look just awful” in that swimsuit that is thrust before my husband’s eyes on every magazine rack I see breaks my heart.

And I’m not fat. Actually, I’m the opposite. My husband guards his eyes, but I get so frustrated with what’s out there. I dress modestly because God calls me to glorify Him. But I have a hard time relaxing (disrobed) around my husband knowing so many better samples have been displaying their wares all day.

]]> By: Wondering... http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-64882 Wondering... Fri, 23 May 2008 04:23:04 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-64882 Good post. Thanks. Good post. Thanks.

]]> By: Allison http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-64863 Allison Fri, 23 May 2008 02:55:50 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-64863 Thanks so much for this post! I've so needed to hear this sort of encouragement recently. Clothes shopping can be depressing, especially when trying to find affordable, modest clothes that don't make me look like a frump. I especially love your emphasis on our freedom from guilt over our bodies. I've lost a lot of weight since our son was born, but I know I still have a ways to go to be healthy. Still, it's encouraging to me to know that I don't need to fret about these last 20 lbs because in Christ I am already a new creation. I'm just being a good steward by attempting to keep this one in good health. :) I haven't ever bought anything from the following two sites, but if I ever get some money for a gift, I might splurge, since EVERYTHING they sell is modest! I love the focus on womanly fashion that shows how a true lady should dress! (Like skirtys for little girls!) If nothing else, they offer great ideas for what to look for when shopping in brick and mortar stores. http://www.modbeclothing.com/ and http://www.shabbyapple.com/ Thanks so much for this post! I’ve so needed to hear this sort of encouragement recently. Clothes shopping can be depressing, especially when trying to find affordable, modest clothes that don’t make me look like a frump.

I especially love your emphasis on our freedom from guilt over our bodies. I’ve lost a lot of weight since our son was born, but I know I still have a ways to go to be healthy. Still, it’s encouraging to me to know that I don’t need to fret about these last 20 lbs because in Christ I am already a new creation. I’m just being a good steward by attempting to keep this one in good health. :)

I haven’t ever bought anything from the following two sites, but if I ever get some money for a gift, I might splurge, since EVERYTHING they sell is modest! I love the focus on womanly fashion that shows how a true lady should dress! (Like skirtys for little girls!) If nothing else, they offer great ideas for what to look for when shopping in brick and mortar stores.

http://www.modbeclothing.com/
and
http://www.shabbyapple.com/

]]> By: Billie http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63848 Billie Wed, 21 May 2008 18:33:10 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63848 Rayia, I have to second Crystal's comment. I think you spoke my heart after my first baby was born. Very well said. Mrs. Wilson, I hope it's alright--I put a link to this post and your post on chastity on my blog. Rayia, I have to second Crystal’s comment. I think you spoke my heart after my first baby was born. Very well said.

Mrs. Wilson, I hope it’s alright–I put a link to this post and your post on chastity on my blog.

]]> By: Crystal http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63846 Crystal Wed, 21 May 2008 18:22:32 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63846 Rayia, Well said, very well said!! I agree whole heartedly, everyone should be fat at some time in their lives. (Kind of like the idea that everyone should have to be a server at some point in their lives.) It is a wonderfully rewarding challenge. I have grown in so many ways while dealing with the weight change that can come from having children. I count your comments as brave and thought provoking. Bless you! Rayia,
Well said, very well said!! I agree whole heartedly, everyone should be fat at some time in their lives. (Kind of like the idea that everyone should have to be a server at some point in their lives.) It is a wonderfully rewarding challenge. I have grown in so many ways while dealing with the weight change that can come from having children. I count your comments as brave and thought provoking. Bless you!

]]> By: Rayia http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63244 Rayia Tue, 20 May 2008 21:12:04 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63244 It's easy to judge "fat" people when you are thin. It's easy to think you're doing it "right" when it's working for you. I used to. But when suddenly you have a baby and your hormones are all out of whack and you start gaining weight for no reason (even tests and Doctors can't explain) and not because of over eating and lack of self control. You start looking past the skin. You see the one-size-fits/pleases-all-sexually models as being empty of any beauty and filled with a thick sticky lie that has them enslaved. And then you see good godly woman, not a one-size-fits-all but a one-man-in-mind-size and see that they are filled with an uplifting, light-filled beauty that radiates from heaven. So many "fat" woman are working just as hard to have a healthy, pleasing body as the "fit/slim" ones. It's humbling to be "fat" and a wonderful experience that teaches you to let go of pride and a judgmental spirit. I know that what I am trying to say is not coming out quite right so I'll quit while I can:o)! It's a long hard journey to lose a lot of weight and a slow one that can be sometimes very frustrating. But my hope is that as I work to shrink my hips/waist, that I will also work to make my soul fat and pray that the Lord in His grace will fill me with the beauty of holiness so that is what people will see first and not my size. Thanks so much Mrs. Wilson for your sweet words and reminders. You have such a lovely heart and it spills out onto the page, with your encouragement and kind balance! It’s easy to judge “fat” people when you are thin. It’s easy to think you’re doing it “right” when it’s working for you. I used to.
But when suddenly you have a baby and your hormones are all out of whack and you start gaining weight for no reason (even tests and Doctors can’t explain) and not because of over eating and lack of self control.
You start looking past the skin. You see the one-size-fits/pleases-all-sexually models as being empty of any beauty and filled with a thick sticky lie that has them enslaved.
And then you see good godly woman, not a one-size-fits-all but a one-man-in-mind-size and see that they are filled with an uplifting, light-filled beauty that radiates from heaven. So many “fat” woman are working just as hard to have a healthy, pleasing body as the “fit/slim” ones. It’s humbling to be “fat” and a wonderful experience that teaches you to let go of pride and a judgmental spirit. I know that what I am trying to say is not coming out quite right so I’ll quit while I can:o)!
It’s a long hard journey to lose a lot of weight and a slow one that can be sometimes very frustrating. But my hope is that as I work to shrink my hips/waist, that I will also work to make my soul fat and pray that the Lord in His grace will fill me with the beauty of holiness so that is what people will see first and not my size. Thanks so much Mrs. Wilson for your sweet words and reminders. You have such a lovely heart and it spills out onto the page, with your encouragement and kind balance!

]]> By: Mindy http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63098 Mindy Tue, 20 May 2008 14:44:17 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-63098 Well, I'm all for the Proverbs 31 woman who made her arms strong! We moms don't always have a son or husband around to help lug that 40# bucket of wheat! True, we don't want to make the Cosmo or Oxygen woman the measure of our beauty. However, we do need to be good and mindful stewards of our bodies. Some of us have our genes, church suppers, and sedentary lifestyles working against us and absolutely must exercise. A little bit of "fluff" is one thing, but when I look at my parents and siblings and see every single one of them obese, I grab my free weights. When I consider that each one is on blood pressure medication, I put on those runnings shoes and head out the door. I know that I can not follow proper stewardship of my body and health without taking the time to have a focused workout almost every day. We certainly want to avoid the idolatry of health and fitness of our culture, yet we do not want to throw out the proverbial baby with the bathwater. We live in such a sedentary culture that we don't even know the exhilaration from getting our heart rates up and producing a good sweat. Getting out there and sweating provides other benefits as well. Exercise has provided for me the freedom to be able to get away from the distractions of the immediate and allow me to think, to plan my homeschool studies, to memorize and meditate on the Word, to listen to good sermons, and to pray, pray, pray. We forget what a wonderful gift physical activity is until we witness a loved one relearn how to walk. May the Lord bless you, dear sisters, as you seek the Lord's and your husband's health/exercise/beauty goals for you. Well, I’m all for the Proverbs 31 woman who made her arms strong! We moms don’t always have a son or husband around to help lug that 40# bucket of wheat!

True, we don’t want to make the Cosmo or Oxygen woman the measure of our beauty. However, we do need to be good and mindful stewards of our bodies. Some of us have our genes, church suppers, and sedentary lifestyles working against us and absolutely must exercise. A little bit of “fluff” is one thing, but when I look at my parents and siblings and see every single one of them obese, I grab my free weights. When I consider that each one is on blood pressure medication, I put on those runnings shoes and head out the door. I know that I can not follow proper stewardship of my body and health without taking the time to have a focused workout almost every day. We certainly want to avoid the idolatry of health and fitness of our culture, yet we do not want to throw out the proverbial baby with the bathwater.

We live in such a sedentary culture that we don’t even know the exhilaration from getting our heart rates up and producing a good sweat. Getting out there and sweating provides other benefits as well. Exercise has provided for me the freedom to be able to get away from the distractions of the immediate and allow me to think, to plan my homeschool studies, to memorize and meditate on the Word, to listen to good sermons, and to pray, pray, pray.

We forget what a wonderful gift physical activity is until we witness a loved one relearn how to walk.

May the Lord bless you, dear sisters, as you seek the Lord’s and your husband’s health/exercise/beauty goals for you.

]]> By: Crystal http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-62660 Crystal Mon, 19 May 2008 19:05:18 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-62660 WOW! That was too long. I am sorry for that. WOW! That was too long. I am sorry for that.

]]> By: Crystal http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-62659 Crystal Mon, 19 May 2008 19:03:25 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-62659 1 Samuel 16:7 But the Lord said to Samuel "Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." Well I just love it! God has certainly given food as a delight and wine to boot and don‘t even get me started on sugar and chocolate. Nancy, you once told me a little story about a difficulty God was walking your family through and you made sure to have good food and chocolate on the table for dinner during this time. You tipped me off to the comfort and joy God provides to His children through the really good things He has made. I have never forgotten this lesson and it is a standard in our household. If the kids have had a rough day, then we bring out the cocoa and marshmallows. If my husband and I are hard pressed, we bring out the wine and the chocolate. What makes me laugh about this it that the "world", (sadly even some Christians who are like minded with the world,) are so busy with the burden of diets and self obsession, making an idol of the body, that they can not truly or fully enjoy these wonderful things God has given us. "They see the can of peaches, but God has not given them the can opener to open the can and delight in the goodness." To roughly quote you Nancy. As always, thank you for the perspective. :) One more thought; As grown women raised in an over sexed and underdressed generation, our perspectives and feelings about our bodies may never be fully redeemed on earth, but we need to look to the future for the perspectives of our children. Our minds ought to be shaped by what God says. In the Old Covenant, in the sacrifices held by the Lavitical priests, the fat was offered to God. It was considered to be the best part. Also, often if a women was gangly, she was considered unattractive and poor. Lastly, the bible does not give us a shape for "beauty", it gives us character examples. We are told in the bible that women like Rachael where in fact regarded as beautiful, but God does not give a description as to what that looked like. Being fat ( not obese,), literally fat, has been looked on as prosperous, blessed by God. What a wonderful thing when God blesses a community and they can feast on God’s goodness. These are just a couple of things to think about when forming opinions about these areas. I am always challenged by God’s word, and God's words should be ours. This is where our perspectives should come from and how we should teach our children. -Mrs. Butler I am fond of you because of the perspective God has given you. Thank you for sweetly sharing it. 1 Samuel 16:7 But the Lord said to Samuel “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
Well I just love it! God has certainly given food as a delight and wine to boot and don‘t even get me started on sugar and chocolate. Nancy, you once told me a little story about a difficulty God was walking your family through and you made sure to have good food and chocolate on the table for dinner during this time. You tipped me off to the comfort and joy God provides to His children through the really good things He has made. I have never forgotten this lesson and it is a standard in our household. If the kids have had a rough day, then we bring out the cocoa and marshmallows. If my husband and I are hard pressed, we bring out the wine and the chocolate.
What makes me laugh about this it that the “world”, (sadly even some Christians who are like minded with the world,) are so busy with the burden of diets and self obsession, making an idol of the body, that they can not truly or fully enjoy these wonderful things God has given us. “They see the can of peaches, but God has not given them the can opener to open the can and delight in the goodness.” To roughly quote you Nancy. As always, thank you for the perspective. :)
One more thought;
As grown women raised in an over sexed and underdressed generation, our perspectives and feelings about our bodies may never be fully redeemed on earth, but we need to look to the future for the perspectives of our children. Our minds ought to be shaped by what God says. In the Old Covenant, in the sacrifices held by the Lavitical priests, the fat was offered to God. It was considered to be the best part. Also, often if a women was gangly, she was considered unattractive and poor. Lastly, the bible does not give us a shape for “beauty”, it gives us character examples. We are told in the bible that women like Rachael where in fact regarded as beautiful, but God does not give a description as to what that looked like. Being fat ( not obese,), literally fat, has been looked on as prosperous, blessed by God. What a wonderful thing when God blesses a community and they can feast on God’s goodness. These are just a couple of things to think about when forming opinions about these areas. I am always challenged by God’s word, and God’s words should be ours. This is where our perspectives should come from and how we should teach our children.

-Mrs. Butler
I am fond of you because of the perspective God has given you. Thank you for sweetly sharing it.

]]> By: Liv W http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-62199 Liv W Sun, 18 May 2008 16:22:58 +0000 http://femina.reformedblogs.com/2008/05/14/an-immodest-standard/#comment-62199 Gluttony is a sin, but being fat (esp. by the narrow standards of the world) is not a sin. Gluttony is a sin committed by both fat and thin. Gluttony is also not just about overeating. It's about making food an idol of sorts. I know many who could be considered gluttons because they give too much attention and credit to some particular diet (whether vegan, high-protein, or the latest fad) as THE answer to all problems. Gluttony is a sin, but being fat (esp. by the narrow standards of the world) is not a sin. Gluttony is a sin committed by both fat and thin. Gluttony is also not just about overeating. It’s about making food an idol of sorts. I know many who could be considered gluttons because they give too much attention and credit to some particular diet (whether vegan, high-protein, or the latest fad) as THE answer to all problems.

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